HMMMMM

So it seems time just flies but problems stay. I have not lost the weight I intended to and I have not made considerable changes in my life. I have moved into a more expensive house but have not improved my salary so I am struggling to make ends meet and well some days it all seems a little weird that life takes hold of you so hard and squeezes all your energy out of you.

And other days you can wake up and feel so hopeful. I think it all comes down to the human spirit. It is crazy how people are able to bounce back from disaster and also how even though the time we are facing is disastrous we manage to survive.

I know that by no stretch of the imagination that i have the worst problems out there- in fact i reckon they are pretty mundane but to me they feel insurmountable some days and others much easier to face. That to me is what is so inexplicable about human beings. Where does the strength come from?

I have been having a ridiculous time at work and I have a ridiculous home life. I have taken measures to fix both but ultimately I think for me to really realise my potential and my ability to achieve happiness I will need to do something risky and that is leave all that I am right now behind. Or is it really just what I do?

I feel tired of trying to make things work when it seems like it should not be such a big effort. I don't know what the answer to all this is but I guess at some point I'll get a little clarity.

I think I am rambling... in fact I am. I best be going.